You’re in a long-distance relationship if you and your special someone don’t live close enough to see each other regularly. Perhaps you moved cities to study or you met someone on holiday, but you’re still keen to keep the relationship going. These kinds of relationships can be tricky, but there are some things you can do to help keep them alive.
Decide that you want to be in one
You need to be sure that you’re both prepared to commit to the extra effort that’s required in a long distance relationship. If only one of you is up for it, it may be better to part ways and give each other space and freedom. If you decide to go for it, make sure there’s light at the end of the tunnel. Be clear on how often you’ll see each other, how long before you can be together more permanently, and that you both have the same picture of how this will work.
Remind yourself of the upside
In many cases, absence really does make the heart grow fonder. When you’re together, it’s that much sweeter, and knowing it’s only for a short time helps you to really appreciate each other. Your time apart also gives you the opportunity to get to know yourself better, which can only benefit any relationship.
Set some rules
Especially when you don’t regularly have face-to-face time with each other, it’s natural to spend time with other people. The trick is to know where to draw the line. Talk openly about things like whether it’s ok to hang out one-on-one with someone of the opposite sex, and whether your lover wants to hear about your wild night out with your friends.
Of course you’ll want to greet each other first thing in the morning and last thing at night, and share what’s going on in your lives, even if it’s mainly by message, with the occasional chat by phone or Skype. Sending a flirty message out of the blue can also work wonders to keep your relationship alive. If you’re constantly WhatsApping to find out what your lover is up to though, you’re soon going to come across as needy and/or possessive. The trick is to get the balance right.
It’s true that a long-distance relationship can be challenging, but if you can make it work, there’s a good chance your relationship will be even stronger for it when you eventually do settle down.